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Scene V:  A Dangerous Meeting!

[The shack of Harry's' is an old dilapidated thing with assorted posters on the walls such as Che Rivera, among other notorious personalities. Posters of rock bands like the Anti-Nowhere League and other heavies adorn the walls as well. The Vic, Harry and McHony are sitting around an empty cabbage crate with a table cloth covering it. Plates of corn beef and cabbage, glasses of lager, silverware and a candle decorate it to celebrate this long awaited event.]

Vic:    And what may I ask is it that you do for a living?

O'B     Oh, Lets just say I'm into residential and commercial structural renovation.

Vic:    Sounds like a promising and rewarding career, if I say so myself!

O'B:    Quite! Oh, excuse for being so rude. Allow me to introduce me mate, Marlin McHony. Mchony, please introduce your self to me dear ole Dad.

McHony: It's my pleasure Vicar O'Brian. How do you do? [He extends his hand to the Vicar. They shake.]

Vic:    Quite well, thank you. What splendid manners your friend has my son. Now just who's manners rubbed of on who? [They all chuckle lightly.]

McHony: Oh, it just comes with the territory I suppose. Ya gotta watch what ya say to each other in this neighborhood. Belfast hasn't always been the nicest place on Earth, ya know. It's not usually this quiet, is it Harry?

O'B:    Ya can say that again ole pal! [A bomb is heard going off some where in town not far away] Sounds like our competitors are at it again! [O'B and McHony laugh to each other] Don't mind us father! Just a little shop humor!

Vic:    Not at all my son, for this is why we meet tonight! To celebrate and enjoy this long awaited evening! Here's to the rest of our lives! May we all flourish and prosper! [They all lift the pints of lager and salute.]

All:    Cheers!

[They clink there glasses together and resume their meal and conversation. The camera view changes to two cops walking past their hideout as they feast. The policeman are talking to each other. It's Patty & Murphy on patrol. They're still searching for a virgin and a bone crusher. They are very tired, hungry and exhausted looking. They knock on the hide-out door to ask who ever is inside for something to eat and drink. Harry sits up to answer the door. Before he opens, he asks...]

O'B:    Who is it?

Murphy: [He seems to recognize the voice, and to no surprise asks...] Is that you Harry?

O'B:    [In total and utter disbelief, he recognizes Murphy's' voice as well.] Murphy! But it can't be? [Harry opens the door and lets both of them in.] I Don't believe it! Ya Survived that explosion? And I thought I had the luck of the Irish landing on that manure lorry! Come in, come in! Here! [He hands both of them plates of food and pints of lager] Have something to eat and drink! This has got to be the luckiest day anyone on Earth in the history of human kind has ever had! This is truly and utterly un-fucking-beleivable! Oops! [Harry turns to the Vic] Sorry for cursing Dad.

Vic:    That's quite alright me lad. On an occasion as great as this, I'll let it slide. Besides, I hear much, much worse where I've just come from. [The Vic stares at the two visitors and immediately recognizes them, but Patty and Murphy don't know yet that the Vicar is really Satan. This is soon to change. The Vicar plays it off with Patty and Murphy and makes believe that they've never met.] My oh my, your a popular chap you are Harry! Must of come from MY side of the family! And who may these fine young men be?

O'B:    These are me mates Patty and Murphy. Gentlemen, meet me dear ole Dad!

Patty and Murphy:
        Good evening Father.

Vic:    This is so wonderful! I can hardly believe me own son has the Bill for mates! Ya don't see that every day now do ya! I guess ya don't have to worry so much about criminals with friends like these patrolling your neighborhood.

[Harry stares at Patty and Murphy and can instantly tell something is very wrong with this picture. He knows Patty and Murphy were never quite I.R.A. material, but he also knows they could never quite fit the Bill as well. Harry starts prying by nonchalantly giving them the third degree.]

O'B:    So, what brings you two to my humble abode?

Patty:  Starvation! Besides, this just so happens to be our new beat, temporarily anyway.

O'B:    I never knew you were in the constabulary? So, when did this all take place? I mean, you two joining the police?

Murphy: Lets just say we were recruited under duress.

Patty:  Yea, we didn't have much of a choice, being where we were and all.

Murphy: Ya could say it was a situation of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

O'B:    [Trying to go along with what's going on, even though it's against his nature] How could fitting the Bill be wrong in ANY way?

Murphy: Just take our word for it for now. I'll tell ya all about some time. It's a long story.

O,B:    [looking at his dad] So, ya never told us what your doing back in town. Just what DOES bring you to this hell hole?

Vic:    Alright then. The story so far... Ya see, my canonization is coming near and the Pope said, I call him John, the Pope says I'll need a virgin to ordain into a Nuns' habit and watch my church while I'm at the Vatican tending to the work of the lord. None of you fine young men would know of such a creature off hand now, would you?

[All four men look at each other, not being able to think of any virgins off hand, then all of a sudden...]

McHony: How about that lass on the south side of town they call "Scary Mary"? I doubt anyone could of shagged her yet. Could they?

[They all look at each other and notice Patty looking down in shame. Patty finally says...]

Patty:  All right, all right! I couldn't help it! I'm sorry, but after that forth pint of Guinness and the two sixths-of-a-gills of whisky, I'd probably shag one of you blokes as well!

[They all nod their heads in agreement with Patty. Even the Vic joins in.]

Murphy: I have a niece, Maureen, but she's only 13 years old. Would the church take a lass that wee?

Vic:    Not in MY parish! Besides, everyone knows the number thirteen
is unlucky, and having bad luck is not welcome much anywhere!

[All the men seem to agree to that statement as well. They go back to thinking.]

O'B:    Crikey! I think I got it! Do any of ya know that Witch who lives in that half-burnt thatch a few miles north of town? Ya'd have to be the bloody Devil ya self to stick ya willy in that ole crone!

[Satan, I mean the Vic, starts to salivate to the point were he excuses him self and runs to the loo. He enters the Lavy and pours cold water down the front of his trousers to calm him self before he explodes. He throws water in his face and looks in the mirror and sees a reflection of him as he really is, The Devil! Afraid that he might look this way to the others, he feels his face with his fingers to make sure his Vicar image is still in tact.]

O'B:    [Looking concerned] Gee, maybe I should see if my Dad is alright.

Murphy: I gotta take a whiz anyway. I'll go check for ya!

[As soon as Murphy enters the lavy, he bumps into the Vicar hard enough so they both land on the floor. As they get up, Murphy asks...]

Murphy: We were all worried about ya out there. Are you al...

[At this point, Murphy looks in the mirror and sees' a reflection of a skull instead of his face and the Good Vic as he really is, THE DEVIL! Murphy's' jaw drops down, nearly hitting the floor boards. Satan sees that his cover is blown and grabs Murphy with both claws by his throat.]
Satan:  [Whispering very angrily to Murphy] What the Hell's taking you
and Patty so damn long! You guys could fuck up a cup of coffee!
I send ya out to do one, I mean two simple tasks, and here I
find ya walking around Belfast like it's New Years Eve in
Edinburgh! [He releases Murphy so he can zip up his

Murphy: [Rubbing his own sore neck] And while where on the subject, what are YOU doing here? And who's watching the ruddy shop while your out pretending to be me best mates long deceased Dad, who by the way doesn't look one bit like you? At least ya coulda' made your self seem older and grayer! He's been dead for 28 years and here you are posing as him as if he hasn't aged one day!

[Satan takes Murphy's night stick, prods it up Murphy's groin and starts twisting it, thus creating a sound of tearing cartilage. Murphy's face is turning bluer than his R.U.C. uniform.]

Satan:  You listen here ya smarmy little cunt, Nobody EVER tells me what to do or how to do it! Get you and your poxic little friends arse back out on the street, find that Witch and bring her here before midnight, or I'll use you AND your mates bones to christen me new bone grinder! Comprende amigo? Oh, and one more thing..."CRACK"! [Satan head butts Murphy.]

Murphy: OWE! [Rubbing his forehead] What the Hell was THAT for?

Satan:  You'll see when you get out side.

[Satan pulls the stick out of his groin, shoves it back in the loop where it came out of and goes back to the dining crate with the others. Murphy stays in the lavy a few minutes longer so he can get his knackers straightened out. Soon, Murphy goes back dinner.]

O'B:    Blimey, Ya been in there long enough! Watcha' do? Drop ya gold fillings down the shitter?

Murphy: Almost. [He grabs his crotch one more time to arrange them properly.] I side tracked me self into a religious conversation with the Vic. You definitely know your bible studies, don't you Vicar?

Vic:    Well, they wouldn't of invited me to the Vatican if I didn't, now would they? [Satan seems pleased with Murphy's "going along with the punches" way of responding. He now turns to Harry and asks...] Son, I'm quite a bit away from my home. Ya couldn't put yer dear old Dad up for the night now, could ya?

O'B:    I wouldn't think of nothing else I'd want more. When the rooster crows, breakfast will be served, won't it Marlin? [Harry kicks McHony in the shins really hard from under the crate. The plates and pints fly up in the air a bit, but not enough to fall over.]

McHony: YEOW! Ya didn't have to do that now, did ya! A simple verbal question woulda' sufficed.

O'B:    I know. I just wanted to get your attention. Ya looked half asleep sitting there. Besides, they don't call me Harry the Bastard for nothing now, do they?

[They all laugh, except McHony. McHony starts to get a look on his face like he's sick and tired of being the butt-end of everyone's joke. It's starting to sink in to his head that if he keeps tagging along with Harry, he will never get any farther than he already is, which is nowhere. He stands up and heads out the door.]

McHony: [In a very irritable tone] I think I could use a nightcap down
the ole gin mill, ALONE!

[As he exits the shack, he slams the door hard enough so a few things rattle, but not hard enough to knock anything about or break anything.]

Murphy: Gee, harry, I think ya upset him a little bit. Maybe one of us should tag along, just in case.

O'B:    Trust me. He gets worse grief than that from the crew down the pub. Besides, he'll probably be better off alone for now.

Murphy: Well, I guess Patty and I better shove off too. Thanks for the grub Harry. It was nice meeting you Mr. Sat...

[The Vicar clears his throat aloud to purposely interrupt Murphy from saying his REAL name.]

Murphy:  Oh, I mean Vicar O'Brian. Lets go, Patty.

[Murphy grabs Patty and they bolt out the door. He starts explaining to Patty what had happened in the lavy. Patty listens carefully, for he has already seen a test of Satan's wrath and doesn't care to see much more of it. He explains to Patty that they have to find and kidnap the Witch Harry had mentioned earlier or else Satan would test drive there bones through his new gadget. Murphy sees a Panda [cop car], puts two and two together [Satan's last head-butt made the car appear] and hops in the car with Patty to fetch the wicked lass.]

Scene VI:  The Witching Hour!

[Patty and Murphy pull up to an old, dilapidated thatch-roof shanty. A candle is seen flickering through a hazy window of the shack. Very apprehensively, they step out of the car. Murphy is holding a roll of duct-tape and Patty has a bundle of rope over his shoulder.]

Murphy:  So, ya ready?

Patty:   Do we have a choice?

Murphy:  Point taken me friend. Lets do this, Brutis! On the count of three. A one-a, And a two-a, and...

[They both bash in the door, but the door is already open. They go flying half way through the house before they both land on there faces. They brush any dust off of them that may of collected from the fall as they push them selves off the floor. They hear the front door slam shut and the dead bolt clink locked. With the exception of a small candle flickering on a table, it's almost pitch black in here. They pull out flashlights from their belt, turn them on and start looking around.]
Murphy: Ya see anything yet, Patty?

Patty:  Nothing but dust and cobwebs.

[A voice says something from behind]

Witch:  I see something! Two uninvited guests! Whatya' doing
trespassing on me property?  Who sent ya here?

[They turn around and see the Witch]

Murphy:  Well, I guess it's us or her.

Patty:   Lets get her!

[They both jump on her, tie her up and tape her mouth shut. They throw her in the back of the panda and take off. They return to Harry's' hideout and knock on his door, but as soon as they do, the Vicar is already waiting there and lets them in.
     The camera changes to a view at night of McHony standing out side of Clancey's Sweets' parlor. He keeps turning his head to make sure no one is looking. He sneaks down an alley way which leads him to the back door of the shop. He pulls a key out of his pocket he had from when he worked there a few years earlier, unlocks the door and enters. He starts filling his back pack up with as much explosives as possible and begins talking to him self.]

McHony:  So, embarrass me in front of your mates, will ya? Use ME for the butt-end of your stupid jokes, aye? Harry O'Brian, you definitely taught the wrong bloke the wrong bag of tricks because tonight your gonna graduate from MY school, PERMANENTLY! [He imitates the voice of Marlin Brando from "The Godfather' or who he inadvertently calls Marlin Pachino] I'm definitely gonna' make ya an offer ya can't re-Fuse! [he laughs at a joke he just made to him self] Bomb! Re-Fuse! I made a funny! I should be a comedian and write for the Comic Strip!

[A long evil laugh is emitted from the disgruntled terrorist student. He exits the parlor, locks the door back up and hies it for Harry's shack.
   The view returns to the hide out with the Vic talking to Murphy.]

Vicar:  So, did ya make good or what?

Murphy: We did exactly what ya asked. She's in the back seat of the car. NOW what do we do?

Vicar:  Don't just stand there, get her out and lets see her!

[Patty opens the back door of the car and instead of finding the witch, a huge Rottwieler hound with broken tape and rope hanging off of it is looking him square in the eyes, growling and ready to tear his tonsils out of his throat. He slams the door shut just as the dog leaps for him. The Vic sees what just happened and decides to go there himself.]

Vicar:  For fuck sake, must I do every thing my bloody self! Get the hell out of my way! [The vicar pushes Patty out of the way and stares the dog down through the window, thus intimidating the hound. He recognizes the dog by its' eyes and says...] It's Antrim Annie! I haven't seen her in over two-thousand years. She's still doing that "Changing her self into a dog" thing. Ya think after all this time years she could do something a bit more original, like a lion or something. Come on Annie, change ya self back so I can introduce ya to me new wrecking crew.

[A cloud of smoke pours out of the back seat of the car with Annie emerging from it. She begins talking to Satan about Patty and Murphy]

Annie:  Obviously amateurs' ya got here me old friend. [She turns to Murphy and says...] Why didn't ya TELL me the Devil was calling on me. I woulda' came running all the way! Call me next time ya ever need me! [Annie hands Murphy a business card. The camera closes in on the the card. The card reads...

                     "For a good time, dial 666!"]

            I've known this bloke [referring to Satan] before Christ was in nappys'. We used to play kick the skull together at that Roman Coliseum. Who do ya think busted the bricks out of that place anyway? Come to think of it Satan, you still owe me for that race of Phoenicians ya wiped out on me. I needed there eyes and tongues fer that spell I was gonna put on those ruddy Roman soldiers. Those fucking Ities' ruined me whole house with there raping and pillaging and what not!

Vicar:  Yea, but I got 'em back, didn't I? Who do ya think gave them the plague? That definitely wasn't God's style now was it?

Annie:  Fair enough. So I guess since we've evened the scored finally, what could be so important that you needed to interrupt me while I was making one of my favorite concoctions?

Vicar:  Why else would someone like me call on some-THING like you?

Annie:  Some-THING like ME? You watch your shitty tongue, Laddy! I still remember some wicked bad spells ya taught me two-thousand years ago. My memory is better than an elephants.

Patty:  [He holds his nostrils shut] Too bad your scent isn't! [Murphy and Patty laugh, but Annie only gets more furious]

Annie:  [To Patty and Murphy] I don't remember ever asking you a DAMN thing!

[Annie points her twisted finger at Patty and Murphy, a lighting bolt shoots out of it and turns them into the other white meat [piggies]! Now, we got two pig's wearing checkered Bill caps running around Harry the Bastards front yard. Satan and the witch are laughing their arses off as they watch the unfortunate duo.]

Satan:  How long do ya suppose they'll stay that way?

Annie:  Who knows? I haven't tried this spell in over a thousand years
and I don't remember how to break it!

Satan:  I thought you just said you had a memory better than an elephant?

Annie:  I lied! Why do ya think everyone calls me a bloody Witch?

[They both burst out in laughter so loud that it's literally shaking the entire Earth!  The landscape takes on a blurring and trembling effect. They finally get a hold of there selves before they destroy the place. They start searching for the pigs so they can bring them back to normal.
  Meanwhile, McHony is seen crawling through the high, uncut grass in a very small back yard of Harry's' shack. He's wearing full army camouflage; half urban (black and white patches) and half B.D.U. (Battle Dress Uniform {Sub Tropical style with leaves and sticks, etc.}) There's a small shrub sticking out of the back of his neck and hanging over his head. He places one bomb next to Harry's bedroom window and an other next to the guest room, where he usually sleeps himself. He thinks the Vicar may be using it tonight! He sets the timers on both devices, watches them for a few second to make sure that they are ticking, and bolts outta' there quicker than light!
  As he exits the back yard, he bumps into the Witch and Vicar chasing the pigs.]

Vic:    McHony, it's about time ya got back. Where the hell have ya
been all night?

McHony: No time for small talk Vic! I got me a date with a foxhole!

[He jumps into a foxhole he dug in the neighbors yard, just incase something exactly like this would happen, and with McHony's lack of Irish luck [He does have an Italian first name, ya know!], the odds are high that they would. And They DO!!!

    For every one in the audience, this would be a good time to get a snack!

    About a half hour later, the smoke clears, but there is not much to look at because...

(Say the following part like a poem or song...)
There is nothing left.
There is nothing right.
There is nothing to and fro. All we know is that our mates have gone to a place below!
  This is as far as this story gets to being a musical.
  So where was I? Oh, yes! Now I remember. We got two Pigs, One Witch, A rogue I.R.A. soldier, his student and The Good Vicar O'Brian, or as he's NOW know as....BEELZEBUB.......
  There are several small dots falling out of the sky directly above where the hideout of Harry the bastard used to stand. The dots seem to be screaming as their images change into human forms. They are now falling in a hole created by McHony's final exam, or where Harry's house USE to be. This hole is so deep that it leads them straight into the confines of......

Scene VII:  The Awakening! (Born Again!)

[Don't worry, they all made it. To Hell that is...]

Satan:  Like always! One of my genius plans works out and ends up finishing FLAWLESSLY and EXACTLY AS I PLANNED IT.

[He puts the priest suit that is now back to the way it looked originally, all torn up, back  on the skeleton and hangs it on a jagged wall. He turns an audio knob up that's sticking out of a cave like wall. A Motorhead song called Bomber is heard gradually growing louder and blaring like Muzak throughout the sub-canyon like landscape. Skeletons of notorious murderers throughout the history of man kind start to come out of nowhere dancing to the music! Atilla The Hun is there, Hitler, Mussolini, Caligula Caesar, French ruler Charlemagne, Myra Hindly is shaking her stuff (is she dead yet?) Jack The Ripper is swinging an axe to the beat and an assortment of biker skeletons pull their choppers up to join in! {Pick your favorite bad guy/gal name and insert here.}  
     The Witch and Harry finally come to, push their selves up from the ground and try to orientate them selves but don't know what to think. Their cloths are torn and not much is left of them. Harry is [or was] wearing pajamas with little hand-grenades printed on the. He's clutching a teddy-bear who's wearing camouflage. They see hundreds of skeletons gathering into a dance area strutting their stuff! Harry and Annie hide behind a huge rock so not to be seen by these living dead.]

Harry:  [To the Witch] So, do you come here often?

Annie:  We just fell hundreds of miles into the abyss and that's the
most original line you can think of?

Harry:  Oh, how rude of me! Me name is O'Brian, Harry O'Brian. [he
 extends his hand to her.]

Annie:  Antrim Annie. And PLEASE don't ask me to dance.

Harry:  [He scratches his head like he may well have, but shakes it off.] Nah. I ain't got the time for it anyway. I gotta find me skipper McHony and prepare for tomorrows field training. [Turning his head in all directions] How da ya get outta' this place? And how did we get here in the first place? [Screaming] AND WHERE THE BLOODY HELL ARE WE ANYWAY?

Annie:  You just answered ya own question mY dear friend, for we have just plunged our spotted little arses into the abodes of... BLOODY HELL!!!!!!!!!

[The music just doesn't stop increasing. The ground, walls, spiring stalactites and stalagmites are rumbling at a near breakable level. The living dead are dancing all over the place. They are drinking, laughing and having a GOOD ole time, a HELL of a time!
    Harry and the Witch try every way out possible, but every route they choose leads to a dead end or total and utter darkness. The only place light seems to be shining is on the dance floor. Satan is all the way in the back of the dancers behind a booth spinning vinyl records and stirring drinks with his tail. As he licks his taloned claws to brush back the little patch of hair on his head and eye brows he has, he sips his drink and begins his search for Annie.]

Satan:  [Not screaming out loud, but yelling hard enough to be heard over the music, for Satan anyway.] Oh Annie? Time to come out and play! Big Daddy's got something SPECIAL for ya tonight!
[The Pigs, still wearing their Cop hats, come running out of nowhere and leap into the arms of Harry and Annie.]

Harry:  Now what? Don't tell me the bloody Bill are recruiting narcotic sniffing swine?

Annie:  Not at all, Harry. These are just two blokes I had to put on temporary hold.

Harry:  Thank God! [Harry pulls out a Marijuana cigarette and starts toking on one end as he lights the other. Harry looks in the pigs eyes and immediately recognizes them.] Patty and Murphy! Ya finally changed for the better, haven't ya? [Harry blows the smoke square in the Cops, I mean the piggy's' snouts! One of the pigs growls at Harry, the other squeals something to the witch.]

Murphy: OINK! Look, were truly sorry we took ya miccy back there before. WEEEET! Could ya PLEASE change us back?

Patty:  SNORT! Yea, We promise we'll be good. We promise to never do it again!

Annie:  Alright, alright. I'm convinced of your sincerity, but I am gonna need a bit more time to recall the spell to bring ya back. Don't you worry your coiled little arses! Ole' Antrim Annie's been doing this for thousands of years, and with nearly a perfect track record as well! [She begins to think of a spell] H'mmm, lets see now. [Suddenly She snaps her crooked fingers with a "Cracking" sound] I THINK I GOT IT! [She begins her cant.]
         Eye of a Geordie, tongue of a Celt, bring these swine back from which they were
         dealt... POOPH!

[The two misguided heroes of this story are safely returned to their original form. Just as things seem to be looking on the bright side, guess who is standing directly behind our fearless foursome?

Satan:  [To Annie] So, ya still like playing hard to get, do ya? In the past two-thousand years' ya' haven't changed much at all now, have you Deary?

[Satan reaches for one of her knockers, but before he can make it, Annie sees a tatoo on Harry's' chest. She tears off what's left of his pajama top and sees a huge tattoo of an ammo belt and a grenade belt crisscrossing Harry's' entire chest and back. With a wiggle of her nose, she magically makes the hand-grenades become real. Harry sees what just happened and grabs as many grenades off his chest as possible. As Satan's mouth opens and begins to make god-awful pervy and roaring sounds, Harry slam-dunks and shoves the explosive diet straight down the beasts throat. Harry grabs Satan's tail and uses it to pack the grenades further into the beast gut, so to make a nice tight package. The Devil is now holding his own throat, choking and trying to hack up the grenades.]

Harry:  After 25 years of I.R.A. training, I finally get to put it to some practical use! Blimey! I just remembered something! [He pulls one more grenade off his back and crams it down his throat.] I almost forgot to fuse him!

[All four of our heroes are seen running for there lives! As soon as they leap behind a large enough rock, KABLAAMO! the Devil is seen shooting up towards the sky, thus leaving a trail of flames and smoke like the space shuttle does at lift off! As soon as the beast hits the proper altitude, he explodes into a display of pyrotechnics brighter than any Guy Falks day celebration ever! The fearless foursome (Harry, Annie, Patty and Murphy) are nearly breaking their necks trying to bend their heads back to witness the extravaganza. Patty and Murphy take off their hats, put them over their hearts and say...]

Both Patty and
Murphy: Now there goes one Hell of a guy!

Annie:  [To Patty and Murphy] What, are you daft? That bloke just tried to grab my knockers!

Harry:  Can ya blame him?

[Harry lays a kiss square on Annie's lips. As soon as he does, a gigantic hand extending
out of a silvery white cloud descends down to where Harry and Annie are standing. Harry's Mum
and Dad are standing on the palm of it. Mrs. O'Brian is wearing a beautiful silvery white gown
and the good Vic has a brand new priest suit on. They take Harry and Annie by the hand and
walks them onto the huge palm, thus leading this truly dynamic-duo into eternal salvation. As
they ascend into the Heavens, the brightest suit of armor and mail ever seen, with a Celtic
cross embedded on the chest plate, emerges on Harry's body! Annie, now beautiful, is wearing a
long, silvery-white gown which leaves an eternal trail of star dust behind her! Several
Cherubim are seen holding the tail of Annies' gown! Patty and Murphy have witnessed something
they can truly not believe.]

Patty:   [To Murphy] Ya know Murphy, this may be all well and good, but why do I still have a craving to roll around in my own filth?

Murphy:  [To Patty] Like the beast Satan said to Annie earlier me ole' mate; Some things never do change now, do they!

[A tap is felt on Murphy's' shoulder. He turns around and to his surprise sees the face of McHony, but in the embodiment of the Devil!]

New Devil: Did I hear some one mention my name, skipper?

[Patty and Murphy scream, soil their trousers and run for their lives!]

Finished October 20, 2000

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